Happy 78th Birthday

Dear Mom,

Eight months ago neither one of us could have imagined the incredible journey that was ahead of us, much less the miracles that have brought us to your 78th birthday. 

The discovery of the cancer in your lung and subsequent surprise finding in your pancreas in January was devistating news. The surreal visits to the specialists who offered little hope and the beginning of chemo where you looked to be the healthiest person in the room despite your diagnosis, felt like a nightmare from which waking was impossible. 

Despite the dark times filled with uncertainty we are both still here. We’ve survived the fears that threatened to overtake us both and found new faith in prayer, God, miracles and each other.

As we celebrate your 78 years of life I’m eternally grateful to have spent 49 of them with you, with greedy hopes of many more.  

Today I was thinking about how in the past you have apologized to me for not doing things the right way, or the way you would have liked to have done them if you’d known better at the time. You have expressed regret for not being good enough.  For letting me down.

On this day, and for every day beyond I want you to know something. Let it sink deep inside you and hold it close.

You are not now, nor have you ever been a disappointment to me.  You have lived your life and made mistakes, but you’ve learned from them and moved beyond them to the best of your abilities. Your strength and humility are remarkable, and I am proud to call you my mother and my best friend. 

Have no doubt that with each day that you are in this world your soul’s impact on others continues to be a positive one. Your compassion, kindness, love and respect for others is my shining example of the kind of person I will always desire to be. 

I am beyond thankful for the remission of your cancer and thankful for all our days – good and bad – spent together.  And while there will never be enough time to satisfy me, I am grateful for the gift of more time today. 

Happy Birthday Mom…I love you with all my heart.